An Oklahoma couple went to extremes to get their children back. Not in an ‘anything for my kids’ kind of a way, more like a ‘some people should not be allowed to breed’ kind of way. Let me explain. Deep breath…
You see, the couple lost custody of their children after their daughter walked in on daddy having sex with a blow up doll.
- Parenting 101: Kids And Blow-Up Dolls…Big Time No No!
The husband, 42 year old William Scot Davis, hatched an elaborate plot that could only come from the mind of a demented freak who likes to stick it to a latex ho while he’s home watching the kids. I guess it’s hard finding a real live woman who’s his intellectual equivalent.
His stupid wife, Heather Dawn Davis, 43, agreed to this brilliant plan. Oh and what was that brilliant plan? He would give up his parental rights to the children if, in return, she would help him fake his death so he could have a sex change operation and start a new life as a woman. He would then come back into the children’s lives with a new identity. And oh yeah…surprise, surprise, surprise (said in Gomer Pyle accent) it would also help him avoid a number of arrest warrants he had. I feel it’s important now to take a look at these two cunning criminal masterminds:
Now these two don’t look like they could plan a white trash BBQ much less an elaborate hoax…am I right?
According to the police report, the woman reported the man missing in late May after she said she had taken him to the nearby lake for some fishing. But the truth was he was just laying low in their double-wide, watching The Steve Wilkos Show and the Oprah farewell episodes thay he had saved on his Tivo.
Naturally, the police became suspicious of the wife’s story, a story that had more holes in it than the tighty whities her husband was wearing whilst lounging on the sofa all day.
Eventally, the woman confessed and told police the man reported missing was at her home the whole time. And, although of no importance to the case, apparently she wanted it recorded in the official report that she wanted her husband out of her life for good. Why do I get the feeling she’s said that a million times before? This guy is a total loser…I mean I’d rather be in a relationship with the blow up doll!
Speaking for all of America, the couple’s trailer park neighbors told News Channel 4 that they thought the idea was crazy.
RC Cox said: ‘Why give up your kids and mess that up to help him out? I’d have told him to jump in a lake somewhere.’
True that, RC. Your soundbites are as delicious as your cola.
The couple have been charged with false reporting of a crime but could face further charges. If being dumb was a felony these two would be receiving a life sentence.
watch the video you’ll see RC!